Ben H. for Bachelor - Week 5 Power Rankings

What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas. Unless you're on The Bachelor, in which case what happens in Vegas gets broadcast on national television. Cool?

Last week, we got the lamest 1-on-1 date in history (though JoJo was nearly blown off the roof by a helicopter), a mostly talentless talent show for the group date, an awkward (but adorable?) 1-on-1 with Becca and Ben and a 2-on-1 makeshift hometown date for the twins (that Chase and I totally called from the beginning BEE TEE DUBS) where we said goodbye to Haley (don't ask us which one that is - we have no idea).

The ladies head to Old Mexico this week (throwback to Megan from Farmer Chris' season!). What can possibly go wrong there? Another Olivia meltdown? Jubilee not fitting in? Pretty much everything? Count us in!

Lauren H.'s talent was dressing in a chicken suit. What the cluck was she thinking?

POWER 5

No POWER 5 losses for either of us last week (thank goodness). I have two left (Caila and Jennifer) and Chase has three (Caila, Becca, Lauren H.).

Admin Note: To help you keep track of where our remaining POWER 5 contestants land in each of our weekly rankings, we will mark them with an *.

POWER RANKINGS

The Rules: We will rank the remaining Bachelor contestants. Points will be awarded each week based on how well each of us predict the contestants going home. For example, if Josh puts CONTESTANT A in spot 7 and Chase puts CONTESTANT A in spot 10 and CONTESTANT A goes home, Josh will get 7 points and Chase will get 10. 

The winner will be based on the player with the most points at the end of the season (this ain't golf, folks). 

After saying goodbye to Haley*, Amber (HALLELUJAH) and Rachel (we hardly knew ya!) the score sits:

• Chase: 126.5
• Josh: 119

I'm running out of time to catch up. Can I swing it? Check out this week's rankings below and keep track!

*Since both of us had the twins ranked together (I had them in spot 8 last week and Chase had them in spot 9), I'm giving each of us half of our respective points (4 for me and 4.5 for Chase) since only one went home.

1. *Caila, 24, Software Sales Representative, Hudson, OH - Just when I thought that Caila was going to start fading, she received the best hashtag that has ever been created from this remarkable reality series: #SexPanther. Almost certainly to the dismay of her current and future family, Caila has been labeled as a sweet girl, but a #SexPanther when you're 1-on-1. Hearkens back to a classic Usher lyric. Regardless of the potential future shame, it was a great week for our favorite #SexPanther and 3-week reigning number 1 contestant.
2. *Becca, 26, Chiropractic Assistant, San Diego, CA - Becca, remarkably, is not the most famous virgin from the past year of The Bachelor. We all remember Ashley I, right?  Becca's 1-on-1 was sufficiently awkward for everyone involved: particularly THE PEOPLE THAT GOT MARRIED BY THE REALITY TELEVISION STARS. Personally, I would've demanded Chris Harrison marry me. Actually... Chris Harrison... I've got a big day coming up...you free in July?
3. Lauren B., 25, Flight Attendant, Marina Del Rey, CA - If you're not on board with Lauren B. yet, you need to get used to it. She solidified herself in the top 3. I'm saying it here first: she'll get to hometown visits. Lauren B. seems (relatively) secure with Ben having 10 other girls around. There is some good chemistry between the two and she has to realize how close she is to being the LLS (Last Lauren Standing). Suffice it to say, Lauren B. and Ben are clicking like the seat belt that is securely fastened over your lap before take off. 
4. JoJo, 24, Real Estate Developer, Dallas, TX - Helicopter dates are just the best. JoJo is doing her part, staying more than relevant and had a great 1-on-1 with Ben. But here's my thing. If she ended a year and a half relationship, 5 months ago...I don't know a ton about casting, but I'm pretty sure that means she auditioned for the Bachelor 1-2 months after getting out of a relatively long term relationship. While it wont be a problem this week, this raises my "here for the right reasons" flag. 
5. Jubilee, 24, War Veteran, Fort Lauderdale, FL - The hate train is in full force towards Jubilee. The girls just do not like her. Ben has been beyond supportive and reaffirmed his feelings towards her. I dropped Jubilee one spot this week not because of anything she did, but because of JoJo's connection. All that aside, Anytime I talk about Jubilee, I really just want to put a bunch of the party emojis in my write-up.
6. Jennifer, 25, Small Business Owner, Fort Lauderdale, FL - The one thing I will say about the Bachelor producers is that they know what they are doing. They weave this intricate story line that the world tweets about (are you following all these tweets?), but they have an end goal in mind. Despite my belief in love at first limousine, I've come to understand that there is no such thing as a truly dark horse candidate. If Jennifer isn't getting screen time at this part of the game, she is 1) not crazy, 2) not a twin and 3) isn't going to last. We hardly even know you, Jennifer. For all we know, she could be a female pantsapreneur. 
7. Amanda, 25, Esthetician, Rancho Santa Margarita, CA - Amanda is a lock for this week. With Olivia's pending heartless "Teen Mom" comment, Amanda will almost certainly be comforted by our Comforter-in-Chief Bachelor Ben. Amanda hasn't really done a ton to stand out, but in all fairness, she also hasn't dressed up like a chicken. So there's that.
8. *Lauren H., 25, Kindergarten Teacher, Ann Arbor, MI - I was watching last week's episode and saw her in a chicken suit and was all like “OH NO SHE COCKADOODLE DIDN’T!” If I were dating a girl that wore a chicken suit as her "talent" on one of our first dates, I would never be able to look her in the face again without laughing. Unless Ben is coop cool with people that dress up like chickens, Lauren H. may have just laid an egg.
9. Emily, 22, Twin, Las Vegas, NV – Alright. So good news. I know which twin is which now. The one on my television screen tonight is Emily. Breaking up with Haley in front of their mother was brutal (particularly considering Ben tried to make it seem like he was just being a good guy about it). With this hometown visit complete, I don't see Ben returning to Las Vegas. 
10. Leah, 25, Event Planner, Denver CO - I had this brilliant plan for Leah. "Hey Chase. Make a point about how little you know about Leah by talking about how much more you know about other famous people named Leah." Upon further review, I know as much about other famous Leah's as I do about Leah the Event Planner from Colorado: Nothing. 
11. Olivia, 23, News Anchor, Austin, TX - There's gotta be a chance Olivia has somehow come across these Power Rankings. And rest assured, my friend, you're only ranked here because I save the best for last in my rankings. In all seriousness, the fact that we have been given the gift of having Olivia invade our televisions for one more week is the best thing that has happened since we got rid of Juan Pablo.

1. Lauren B., 25, Flight Attendant, Marina Del Rey, CA - Getting a group date rose is honestly more impressive than a 1-on-1 date rose. And Lauren B. pushed all the right buttons to get one from Ben last week. Do we have our front-runner? It’s close but right now, I’d say we sure do.
2. *Caila, 24, Software Sales Representative, Hudson, OH - The chemistry is strong (THEY TOTALLY MADE OUT AS SOON AS THEY WERE ALONE) and Caila handled herself well during the jam-packed group date. She didn’t get the group date rose but I imagine it was close. Safe for a while. 
3. Becca, 26, Chiropractic Assistant, San Diego, CA - A slamming 1-on-1 date (the connection was there even if they were awkwardly marrying people in a Vegas chapel) + a confident discussion about their shared faith (though Ben’s version involved gettin’ wit a bunch of girls) = Becca’s safety until late in the season.
4. JoJo, 24, Real Estate Developer, Dallas, TX - The dates on this season have been mediocre. But JoJo’s date was the worst. Don’t get me wrong. It wasn’t really bad for her. It actually seemed to go pretty well. But we barely saw any of it thanks to the Olivia drama and the “surprise” twin date we totally saw coming. But she still got a rose so she’s in the Top 4 for this week.
5. Lauren H., 25, Kindergarten Teacher, Ann Arbor, MI - Look. I applaud her for confidently claiming her talent was reciting a children’s rhyme in a chicken suit. And she did get a kiss during the group date from Ben. Though she did have to pretty aggressively make out with Little Ben first. Errrrr. I should mention - Little Ben was the puppet. Right? 
6. Amanda, 25, Esthetician, Rancho Santa Margarita, CA - The two kids at home thing still hasn’t caught up to her yet (mostly because she's stayed out of the limelight) and I think she’ll get a 1-on-1 either this week or next week. She’s safe for a while but this teen mom (OLIVIA SAID IT NOT ME), can’t win.
7. *Jennifer, 25, Small Business Owner, Fort Lauderdale, FL - Still a mystery. I thought she might break through but she just hasn’t had a chance. With bigger fish to fry, she’s okay for another week. But sadly for me (CURSE THIS POWER 5 PICK) and I guess for her too (losing love and all), she’ll be gone soon. 
8. Jubilee, 24, War Veteran, Fort Lauderdale, FL - She can play the cello. Cool! But that won't help her in the long run. The Bachelor is simply not the show for her. She just doesn’t have the personality to compete with 10 other girls who live in the same house and date her boyfriend while she is dating him. She’s not long for this show. But the good news is, the way she thinks about dating is how the actual world thinks about dating. So she should be just fine.
9. Emily , 22, Twin, Las Vegas, NV - The 2-on-1 date happened. The producers definitely forced it Ben apparently asked for it. And Haley went home. But now that there is only one twin left (and he’s sure he kept the right one, right?), do we think she will shine on her own? Jury’s still out but I think she will soon become "persona non grata" for the simple fact that she probably thinks that phrase means a delicious Thanksgiving dish. 
10. Leah, 25, Event Planner, Denver CO - What? I still don’t know anything about you. I’m ranking her this low because I’m willing her to go home. WILLING HER. But with my luck, she’ll be in the final 3 and I still won't be able to pick her out of a line-up of only her.
11. Olivia, 23, News Anchor, Austin, TX - Her talent in the talent show during the group date was questionable (she danced?). And she got immensely upset that a puppet insulted her (so much so that she pulled out the tried and true Bachelor panic attack - see: Poe, Kelsey). And even after all that, Ben still kept her around. But I think Old Mexico will get the best of her. The girls are leaving Vegas this week and I think Olivia’s luck has run out.