Joyful JoJo the Bachelorette - Week 4 POWER RANKINGS

So the last Bachelor Power Rankings post (two weeks ago before the dramatic double episode) was super short (due to my huge procrastination in getting it up). But I kind of got the impression that our regular readers (THANK YOU TO WHOEVER YOU ARE) kind of liked just getting straight into the rankings with no frills. So instead of an intro and a recap of all the rules and explanation of the scoring and a reminder about what the POWER 5 is each week, I thought we should stick with short and to the point.

If you want a recap of the rules, an explanation of scoring or the info on the POWER 5, I'll post a separate entry and link to it starting next week.

Totallllllllllllly normal way of knocking on a door.

Otherwise, without further ado, here is the latest score plus our updated rankings (* denotes our DEEP DIVE POWER 5 picks from before Week 1, ** denotes our TINDER POWER 5 picks from before Week 1 and *** indicates the person was in both of the above POWER 5 lists).

Last week we said goodbye to Ali, Nick B., Christian and Chad (we think).

The Score (So Far):

Chase - 34
Josh - 49

WEEK 4 POWER RANKINGS
 

1. James Taylor - James Taylor took The Bachelorette world by storm last Monday night. His adorable guitar-player two-stepped his way to the top of the rankings this week. While his one-on-one date was, as the kids say, “fire”, he stepped up his game playing football. Not only did he get injured, but HE KEPT PLAYING LIKE A MADMAN. Dude was so wrapped up he looked like King Tut. But kept playing. Hopefully after passing concussion protocol. James Taylor takes first place for his gentle dancing, smooth guitar prowess & reckless disregard for medical safety. And because two loyal readers sent me a note saying James Taylor reminded me of them. But mostly the first part. But definitely some of the second part.
2. **Luke - So let’s set aside the sheer amount of clichés that came out of Luke’s mouth on the 1-on-1. (Don’t we all live for those moments that make the hairs on our neck stand up? Don’t we all get those feelings by looking into JoJo’s eyes?). The dude has a great story, personable, and seems to have a bit of a bad-boy side to him. JoJo digs it.
3. ***Chase - Started from the bottom now he’s here! Chase makes a BIG jump from last week into the top 3. Judging from The Twitter World, everyone seems to love Chase. And let's be real: Chase's 1-on-1 was lights out. I think he is a legitimate contender & would be pretty surprised if he doesn't get to hometowns. And his name. I mean, damn.
4. *Jordan - Did you all know Jordan played football? If he tells us one more damn time about his old glory days…
5. Wells - Ball security, Wells. He’s not the most athletic guy, but he seemed to be positively contributing to the team. UNTIL ON THE GAME DECIDING PLAY HE LET THE BALL GET RIPPED OUT OF HIS HANDS. Rule #1 of The Bachelorette: Never let another man take the football from you when a date with JoJo is on the line. Or maybe Rule #1 is don’t be Chad. Either way, we’re working on the official Bachelorette Rule Book. And it’s definitely in there.
6. Alex - It is tough to say, but Alex won. Alex won for America. (But did he actually? Wouldn’t we all have benefited with another few weeks for Chad?). Alex will stick around a few more weeks, but he’s not the one for JoJo. That said, he still has half of a 2-on-1 left to go with JoJo. I’m interested to see what his personality actually shakes out to be. I don’t know what he’ll talk about. Maybe he’ll just eat sweet potatoes. 
7. Derek - Derek came up big in the football game. And he still looks like Jim Halpert. So it was a good week for him. I wish he had put something of Chad’s in a Jello mold. But alas, we’ll have to just keep tweeting references from The Office during the show. No complaints on my end.
8. **Grant - Free fallin’! Grant, who has officially been called Squidward on national television, just couldn’t get any traction this week. 
9. Robby - 9th ranked in this week’s rankings, but just nothing substantive to say. He swims? So I mean. I guess he’ll do well on a pool party date?
10. Evan - NEVER POKE A MAN IN HIS BELLY BUTTON, OKAY? 
11. Vinny - Why is Vinny still around? We could’ve had another week of discussing how much we hate Chad. Thanks, Vinny.
12. James F - I’m sure James F. is a perfectly nice guy and he may stick around a few more weeks. But really, he’s just a good place holder. 
13. Daniel - One thing we know for sure about The Bachelorette: A villain’s wingman can only be as good as the villain himself (add it to the rule book). Daniel positioned himself early on as the drunk and then the villain’s hype man…but then he was all like “Hey Chad, maybe don’t be like Hitler.” But it was too late, Daniel is inextricably linked to being Hitler’s drunk friend. That is not a good look.

1. *Jordan – Dude absolutely crushed it as all-time QB during the group date at Heinz Field in Pittsburgh. As he put it, he was “dropping dimes out there” and “picking defenses apart.” The competition was… questionable. But JoJo was impressed enough to give him the group date rose. And I’m impressed enough to give him the top spot.
2. **James Taylor – I fear he may ultimately end up in the “friend-zone” but for now, no reason not to keep him near the top (he had a great 1-on-1 on the first of the two episodes last time). Plus he played like a true NFLer during the group date challenge – with an obvious concussion!
3. *Luke – His 1-on-1 with JoJo was HOT (tub). A big move up for the Texan.
4. ***Wells – He’s playing the long game. And as such, he will remain in my Top 5 until he does something that warrants a huge move down. Keep those wheels (and records) spinning.
5. Alex – His conversation in the woods with Chad was so strange, I could barely comprehend what was going on. Amazingly, not only did JoJo decide to keep Alex and send Chad home on the 2-on-1 date, she seemed overjoyed to choose Alex and was canoodling and kissing him like crazy. Even still, Alex doesn’t have staying power. He will be gone well before the end.
6. **Chase – JoJo listed Chase as one of the guys who has made a good impression so far when talking to Ben Roethlisberger. That’s a good sign since she only listed a handful of other guys.
7. **Derek – A bold move confronting Chad Bear in the house but got out of there unscathed. And I think Chase first alerted me to this but HOW MUCH DOES DEREK LOOK LIKE JIM HALPERT FROM THE OFFICE???
8. Grant – Quiet week for the firefighter. For now, he will stay nice and steady in the middle.
9. James F. – There’s only room for one James on this season. And you are not it. You didn’t even sustain a nasty head injury for JoJo. SMH
10. Robby – The “girlfriend back home” tease during the season preview after Episode 1 still has me worried. And since he hasn’t particularly impressed, I don’t mind keeping him this low anyway.
11. Evan – Has this guy ever worn sports clothes before? Move it along, brah.
12. Vinny – Dude. Who are you?
13. Daniel – It’s truly amazing that despite his embarrassing performance on the first night that he is still around. But perhaps he’s emulating fellow Canadian Justin Bieber who turned things around after peeing in a mop bucket to release a pretty universally acclaimed album. Ehhhhhh, on second thought, probably not.